Tomorrow I will go to the cemetery and sit with my Angel for awhile, then its off to Jose,Jr's house to have brunch with him and his girlfriend former Miss Argentina, later we will go to my younger son Jose, III, the doctor, and we will bring in the New Year all together.
I can remember that first New Years with my Angel she wore a beautiful white dress, her hair pulled up high, her hair all glittered with silver and gold. We went to my uncles home in Manhattan, then to a PR club, where we danced the night away, only 16, she did not drink that night, but me I got smashed, with no driver's licence, and never driven a car before, she drove us back to the Bronx, me telling her where to make turns, I knew that she could do it, she was quite something, beauty, brains and spunk, BTW, her folks never found out that their little girl drove us both home. I remember that night like it was yesterday.

Happy New Year Jose, yep, those were great years
the early 60's, I remember when Victor and I along with little Victor came back to NY after being exiled to Puerto Rico, we couldn't afford an apt. we were lucky my dad paid the airfare for us to come back to NY, I called your Angel and told her I wanted to come back to NY, about a week after we got home, living with my dad, she drove into the city and we went looking at apts. I found the one on Morris Ave. and she wrote a check for the first months rent and deposit, never asked for a nickel of it back.
She was just like that, no questions asked, she would do things for people and just smile knowing she made someone happy. Jose, how many stories can you tell? I have hundreds of stories of things she did and never blew her own horn, never bragged about who she helped or why. When she died, the world lost a true Angel but heaven gained a singing Angel to watch over those she left.

Jeez, sounds like a true blue Bronx girl, Paradise obviously you were also a Bronx friend of hers. I get the feeling that she was a very compassionate person, usually singers are more selfcentered, but she was very down to earth. kind to a fault and really cared about her friends/family. I guess I can understand why Jose has the feelings that he does. I wonder if her X boyfriend feels guilt/anger or whatever seeing as he dumped her when she needed him the most. How could he just walk away, turn his back on someone he suppose to have loved? His heart must be made out of ice.

Paradise53 PM me, I have a couple of questions to ask you.

Hello ladies, I've been under the weather since New Years, guess as we get older the old body starts to tell us to behave. Paradise, yes my Angel was generous to a fault, and if you were her friend she would back you up 100%, as you well know. She was a hard worker and demanded perfection from everyone associated with her singing group, The Innocents, if she was putting on a show, it had better be done right the first time, that's just the way she was, she gave the audience what they came to see, a oldies show she gave 100% of herself so that everyone had a good time.

You know Suzie, I'll give X boyfriend the benefit of the doubt, maybe he lied to her the whole time about what he wanted to do, and maybe he wanted to do somenthing but couldn't bring himself to actually do it, I know that makes no sense but maybe he really wanted to be with her, but because of circumstances????? he would hurt too many people? He has never come to any event that the family has and there are two a year, he's on a mailing list and never responds, so maybe he's content to live out his days ignoring everyone. We'll never know as mums the word. We can guess all we want, she's gone and he is not saying a word oblivously.

All I know is that the girl I knew, was bright, smart and extremely talented. She could belt out a song with that voice of hers and everyone would stop what they were doing and listen.

Naturally, I knew her during those HS years, she was funny, and everyone liked being around her, she wasn't a snob, but fit in with everyone. I remember our music teacher Mr. Rayburn always was teaching her something about music, Mr. Rayburn would bang his hands on the stage to get her to hit those high notes, which after a while she hit without any problems.
I'm glad that her life turned out OK, sorry that I didn't keep in touch, sorry that she is no longer with us.

I will be having the pleasure to see one of my Angels favorite singers on Jan. 19th, in New York, Arlene Smith of The Chantels will be in concert and I will be there. My angel thought the world of Ms. Smith and that's also another reason that my Angel got into singing. Yes, kind, loving and true blue to a fault, she was very loyal to her friends and even more loyal to those she loved, unfortunately some people confused friendship with cheating and caused her great harm and misery. Anyhow, off to NY I go have tickets second row seats, can't wait.
I'm sure that my Angel was be singing along with Arlene when she sings "Maybe".

You know Jose, I've talked to alot of classmates that went to school with me and nearly everyone I spoke to except maybe one person had nothing but good to say about K, there is a annual reunion at the school and her name comes up often, she was just one of the girls that everyone remembered. I can remember that she'd hang out at Mama's luncheonette at lunch time, usually some of the boys from Creston JHS would be there to and she'd be laughing and having a great ole time. That was around 1961 I think, my memory isn't what it used to be.

You have a good time at the concert, I can hear K right now......Maybe if I cried every night, you'd come back to me, and maaaaybe****what a great song.

Im so sorry I never met this girl. She truly sounds like an angel sent from heaven.

The concert at Lehman College was out of sight, Martha Reeves was a hell of a MC, the people were a rockin n rollin all night long. Arlene Smith has a voice that is just fantastic, the place was packed. I got to go backstage for a few minutes to meet with Arlene, what a gracious lady. Anyone that didn't go to the show missed a really great time.

Gotta tell you something really weird happened that night, as they introduced Arlene and the Chatels, a mist appeared on stage, the mist stayed behind Arlene and smelled like roses, no one could figure it out, I spoke to several people and asked if they saw the same thing I did and they added that there was no smoke/mist machine in the area. It only happened when Arlene was singing, then gone. It was the weirdest thing.
And the smell of roses.......left me shaking my head.

Glad that you had such a good time, I think one of the best songs in the world is The Chantels
"Maybe", her voice keeps getting better with age. Saw her on the PBS special, the woman is just so great and the wonderful thing is she stayed in the Bronx.

Can you imagine a duet sung by your Angel and Arlene.I get goose bumps thinking of it.
Two very powerful voices singing "Maybe". Do you believe in spirits? Is it possible that your Angel was there? I believe that there are spirits that watch over us, they guide us and that in times of need, they try and tell us something, could that be what the mist was. Like saying I'm here with you, I'm always with you. I think we have guardian angels and somethings can't be explained. Like the smell of Roses,glad you had a good time anyway.

Yes, "Maybe" is one of the greatest doo*** songs around, and if you listen to the words, you know its about a girl hopeing that her lover will come back to her, that's the way it was back in the Bronx, boy meets girl, they fall in love, then puff its over and we're suppose to move on. Recently I went to visit my older brother he lives on 116th St. he's all alone now, his wife died, sits in the apt. watching TV alot, everytime I visit he always brings up my Angel, he and his wife adored her, they really wanted us to get married, in fact, my Angel is my nephews Godmother, little Joey now a grown man adored her, even after we split she kept in touch with the whole family.

Several things have happened in the past couple of years both to me and her family that make us wonder. Things that meant something to her, like a particular picture she had hung all over her bedroom, is always moist, wet feeling yet the picture stays in tact, like the picture is crying. That smell of roses, that can't be explained. Sometimes I wake up at night and swear I've heard her calling my name. Its not only happened to me but to other people as well
Some things can't be explained, I don't let it bother me because if there is something out there I know in my heart that its a good thing and it won't hurt me.

Jose, my late sister Micky had all the records of The Chantels, your Angel and I would sit for hours listening to them. She loved to sing along with the records, since I got my sisters record collection when she got married, your Angel would borrow 20 at a time, take them home and play them over and over, bring them back and get another handful. I had quite a collection but your Angel outdone me by maybe 200 or so. Her collection must be worth a few bucks by now, if the family still has them.
I remember when Johnny and her were first singing together, she had a very powerful voice and she'd drown him out most of the time, she had to learn to sing quieter, I wonder whatever happened to him, I know she was going crazy there for awhile trying to find him, she once told me that no matter who she was with, she always kept her thoughts of him to herself. But deep down he meant something to her, I knew her better than anyone and if Johnny ever found her I think they would have picked up where they left off......no offense to you Jose, but that boy got under her skin and she never stopped thinking of him. You know Jose, I miss her sooo much, she was closer to me than Micky was and she was blood. Keep the memories alive, its good for the soul. Gotta run.

Wow, I remember Micky, wiggling down the street with those tight capri pants, she was something
the guys in The Associated would go crazy, the brothers John and his little brother would go ape sh)t over her, and she knew it, she was quite the flirt. I was sorry to hear that she died, interesting that the love of her life, moved right around the corner and they stayed together for all those years. Makes me wonder about my Angel and loverboy, they would have been together 7 yrs this month, I know because she kept a detailed diary, I still wonder if they would have made it, so unfair, not thinking of myself, but that she finally found someone she really loved and he threw it all away. I think of Johnny Gorman too, he was a real decent guy, I heard from people that he never did anything to cause her pain, he was a standup guy. I was sitting here tonight looking at the engagement ring I gave her, yes I still have it (she returned it, but you already know that) I never had to guts to give it to anyone else, I close my eyes and can relive those days they seem so real, like yesterday, yes I'll keep those memories alive, her memory will never die, as long as I have a
breathe in me.

I saw an item on another site where someone was looking for Johnny Gorman, maybe the guy doesn't want to be found, I know that her family is also looking for him, maybe the guy remembers her, but for whatever reason feels it should be left alone, years go by and maybe he doesn't want to upset his family or wife or whatever. Seeing as she's not with us anymore he could drop a note just to say he's alive, well and remembered her and leave it at that. Funny how we remembe certain things from our teen years, all this talk and I got a group together from school and we had a great time. Talking about this and that, some brought school pictures, yearbooks......we had a blast.

What are you talking about 7 yrs with who?? Loverboy who?? The list of characters gets confusing. So what kind of a engagement ring did you buy her? Diamonds? I'm suprised she gave you back the ring, I wouldn't have dont that. But it was a decent thing to do, she had class, she always did. Those of us who knew her back then, well, she was one of us, part of a school family, may she rest in peace.

Ha, I gotta laugh, once my Angel met me, she forgot all about Johnny Gorman, or at least I thought so, I remember a summer night she was sitting waiting for me to get off work, I saw her talking with someone as I walked across the street, it was Gorman, I got ****ed, she was watching him walk down the street, I saw that look in her eyes, I wanted to strangle her, we had a huge fight that night, I was so jealous of that guy, he was a nothing, plain, skinny kid but for some reason she liked him or loved him for whatever reason.

Back then I wasn't making much money maybe $70.00 a week, I bought her a ring that I could afford and gave it to my brother and sister in law on 116th St. to hold for me. It was April and we went to visit them, while we were there I got the ring and while we were in the elevator going down I asked her to marry me, she said yes and she proudly wore my ring, it was paid for, and by todays standards not a huge ring, it has a diamond and little chips of diamonds on the sides.

My Angel met her loverboy in 2001, that's where I got the 7 yrs from, he filled her head with a bunch of lies, oh we're going to be together, I'll find a way. I've read her journels I know what he said to her, she wrote every word down,she caught him in many lies about what he did most days, she didn't even care, she thought the world of him and thought for sure they would have a life togehter. He played her and in the end destroyed her, she couldn't bare to live her life without him, I hope that on Feb 14th when he looks at his wife and wishes her a Happy Valentines Day, he chokes on those words and remembers that in 2001, he said the same to the one person that loved him unconditionally.

You were rolling in dough back then LOL wow a whole $70.00, but I bet apt rent was something like $45.00 or $50.00 and gas was what .17 cent a gallon. I'm sure you bought her a very nice ring, a couple of years from now it will be a antique and you'll get big bucks for it.

I'm wondering if this Johnny Gorman hasn't already gotten the word that someone is looking for him, I mean somebody must know him and if they had investigators looking for him, he either doesn't want to be found or doesn't want to be reminded? Strange that he wouldn't want to at least send a e-mail or something, or maybe he's dead too. Interesting don't you think.

Loverboy, another interesting thought, I bet he wasn't serious at all, he knew all along what he was doing, bored guy, nothing better to do, so why not play the part of a dashing Romeo, ready to ride in and save the damsel in distress
meanwhile, the wife doesn't have a clue, thinks loverboy is spending his days cleaning the house or running errands, she's a bigger fool or doesn' give a crap after xxxxx yrs. Yes, he was the fool, he played the game and lost big time.

Happy Valentines Day to all the lovely ladies on the board, yes, Feb 14th I know that date has meaning to two people, one is dead, the other alive and well, hope he enjoys his day, and I hope he thinks for just a second of my Angel. Enough I get myself all in a knot when I think of his guy, he's roaming around fancy free, not a care in the world, meanwhile my Angel is in a cold grave.

Back in those days Suzie, life was good, a couple of bucks and we could go out to city island and have a nice dinner, then go to Orchard Beach and watch the sunset. We'd go down to Manhattan and eat with my brother, then back to the Bronx, those days are long gone but the memories linger.

Don't know about Gorman, its a mystery and unless he comes forward, oh well...I know her daughter was a a website and posted something she checked and he hasn't even opened the mail.
Another person was suppose to leave a message and I guess he didn't answer that either. Here's a guy who someone thought a lot of and I guess he doesn't want to be bothered or doesn't
remember or want to remember.

Happy Valentines Day

Perhaps he's dead.

Jose, those days are long gone, as is the Bronx that you remember, now we have all kinds of Latinos, Dominicans', Haitians etc. I was over to Inwood the other day geez Louise, that place is difinitely not the Inwood of the 50's/60's.
Almost as bad as the Bronx, there are those that say the Bronx is coming back, well, maybe I know that with all the breakins in and around Sedgwick Ave. cops at the 50th are not eating donuts or sleeping in their cars.

So you mentioned your brother, how many brothers do you have? Isn't 116th St. Spanish Harlem? You used to go to City Island? Me too, when I was married the first time, me and my boys would go out there and watch the boats
have lunch and walk around, we'd take the bus.
But that was a very long time ago.

Funny, how you remember certain people, like this Johnny person, he must have been something special for your Angel to remember him all those years, wonder if he ever thought of her, funny as we get older, we wonder about certain people, is it that we realize time is running out or do we want to relive those times all over again. Whereever he is, I hope he realizes that people (some more than others) cared and he was remembered kindly.

Jose, the past is the past, whatever happened between loverboy and your Angel is over, he made his bed and has to deal with his own thoughts (good or bad) he choose which way he wanted his life to be and he has to live with that. Your Angel is at peace, her life was full I'm sure and her memory will live on through you and her family. Be well.

quote:

Originally posted by Suzie:
Jose, those days are long gone, as is the Bronx that you remember, now we have all kinds of Latinos, Dominicans', Haitians etc. I was over to Inwood the other day geez Louise, that place is difinitely not the Inwood of the 50's/60's.
Almost as bad as the Bronx, there are those that say the Bronx is coming back, well, maybe I know that with all the breakins in and around Sedgwick Ave. cops at the 50th are not eating donuts or sleeping in their cars.

So you mentioned your brother, how many brothers do you have? Isn't 116th St. Spanish Harlem? You used to go to City Island? Me too, when I was married the first time, me and my boys would go out there and watch the boats
have lunch and walk around, we'd take the bus.
But that was a very long time ago.

Funny, how you remember certain people, like this Johnny person, he must have been something special for your Angel to remember him all those years, wonder if he ever thought of her, funny as we get older, we wonder about certain people, is it that we realize time is running out or do we want to relive those times all over again. Whereever he is, I hope he realizes that people (some more than others) cared and he was remembered kindly.

Jose, the past is the past, whatever happened between loverboy and your Angel is over, he made his bed and has to deal with his own thoughts (good or bad) he choose which way he wanted his life to be and he has to live with that. Your Angel is at peace, her life was full I'm sure and her memory will live on through you and her family. Be well.

---SUZIE--- HOW BAD IS IT AROUND SEDGWICK AVE ?, I ONLY LIVE ABOUT ONE MILE FROM SEDGWICK AVE. I LIVE IN UPPER RIVERDALE. I GO TO THE VISITATION CHURCH EVERY SUNDAY AT 8:30 AM, IT IS ONLY THREE BLOCKS FROM SEDGWICK.---JOHNNY